Yes, yes, yes, I am NOT really at all thinking about marriage at all, right, but doesn't a colourful dress just make the whole occasion that little bit more joyful? Yeeeesss, it doeeeees!
In a way this is an odd time. Spring is bringing change to everything and in particular everyone. Many are leaving. Niko, Danis ex flatmate, is going to Portugal. Jorge the portugese beach comber and heart crazyman is leaving too. Dani had a mental breakdown yesterday and has now taken a week off work to reconsider circumstances.
Just coming back in for work after smoking a cigarette I felt how it played the strings of my heart. In a way we might not all be close but in the essence of it all is that the Blue Building of IBM in Greenock has grown to become a whole union of extraordinary people, all bearing one common step in their lives: Leaving home and maybe even home country behind to start a new life.
In a way everyone here is connected. Friends, ex-partner, flatmates, working colleagues, project partners, the other one on the bus every morning... Up until now none of the those who left, left me with an empty space in my heart and it will be a whole new experience to not be the one leaving lightheartedly myself but being left behind by people who have become dear to me. I don't really feel regret. I don't even feel I want to get out of Scotland, or Greenock or IBM, yet. I am happy with what I have, happy with what I do and happy with the wonderful man I have in my life now. I lead MY life now.
But maybe I'll light a couple of candles fr those who are leaving this week, sailing on to new habours of life and maybe I'll think of them and wrap them in kind, warm thoughts and love and smiles to nurture them on their way. I feel that is what guardian angels live on, other peoples good thoughts for you.
